David Letterman’s Post Michael Jackson Acquittal Monologue

David Letterman joked during his Late Show monologue on Monday night, “The verdict is in and is not guilty on all charges. However, his plastic surgeon was found guilty on all counts. … This just in, Saddam Hussein wants his trial moved to Santa Maria, California. … After the trial the press was talking to the jurors and one of the jurors said that Michael’s innocence was as plain as the nose on his face. … Michael had lots of supporters. In fact even if convicted his chimp said that he would wait for Michael. … We knew the jury was close to a verdict today because earlier they asked the judge to see O.J.’s glove. … Michael said he was thankful for the California legal system and a jury of 12 dumbasses.”

Jackson Could Be Suing Martin Bashir And Granada

June 15, 2005 – The Evening Standard reports that following his acquittal on child molestation charges, is now expected to sue Martin Bashir and Granada, which made the documentary about the King of Pop. Jackson claims Bashir, who interviewed the singer at his Neverland ranch, had broken a promise to allow the star to vet the program. Read more.

The Bad News Following Jackson’s Acquittal

June 15, 2005 – Jay Leno joked about Michael Jackson’s acquittal during his Tonight Show monologue on Monday night. “Kinda slow news day. Did anything happen today? Good news for Michael Jackson, not guilty on ten counts! The bad news – he’s going to Disneyland,” Leno said. “I tell you was so happy with the verdict, when he got back to the Neverland Ranch, he gave all the cleaning monkeys the rest of the day off. … Well it’s over. Thank God. Now Michael can go back to just being a regular guy. Watch the game, have a brewskie.”

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