Jack And Kelly Osbourne On Last Call

Jack and were on Last Call with Carson Daly on Wednesday night to promote their new ‘Osbournes’ DVD and talk about how Jack is doing after rehab. They also expressed their disappointment with Nick Lachey and Jessica Simpson’s MTV reality show ‘Newlyweds’, saying they just copied what they did with their show. But they felt sorry for Jessica, because the show makes her look like an idiot. Read on for a rough transcript.

Carson: Welcome back. Because of my next guests, NBC actually had to hire three extra bleeper operators, just to monitor what’s about to go down. Say hi to our favorites, jack and Kelly Osbourne.

[ Cheers and applause ]

Carson: Wow. Goodness, you guys look fantastic. You make a great couple. Sick and wrong, ain’t it?

>> Yep.

Carson: Well, it’s great to have you guys here. Jack, I haven’t seen
you in forever, man.

>> Yeah, it’s been a while.

Carson: How are you?

>> I’m doing very well.

>> Get off my dress.

>> Sorry.

Carson: Yeah. Oh, boy. Here goes the fighting. I don’t think I’ve seen
you since you’ve been out of rehab.

>> No.

Carson: How — are you okay?

>> Yeah.

Carson: You’re feeling good?

>> I’m real good.

Carson: Yeah? How was that whole rehab experience?

>> It was really cool, actually.

Carson: Right?

>> It was like a — a lot of soul searching.

Carson: Right. Kelly, did it bother you that all that press was on about
jack in rehab, and when you would read about it —

>> I hate the way that —

Carson: This is a brave thing, that somebody’s getting help.

>> Yeah, I don’t understand why people make it into a bad thing. Like, “ooh, he’s into rehab!” When every single person who probably wrote something does drugs. And he’s a better person at 17 years old to admit that he has a problem and go in and fix it.

Carson: Right. Right.

[ Applause ]

>> And instead of like putting down about it, they should praise him
and be like “wow, that’s amazing.” Instead of “ooh” — you know, it’s stupid.

Carson: Well, anyway, it’s good to have you here. So who moved — you moved out of the house?

>> Kind of.

Carson: And you still live at home?

>> Yeah.

Carson: And where do you live now?

>> I bought a house, I didn’t like it. Because I didn’t like living by myself. I’m like, I’m too little to live in a house by myself.

Carson: But you have some, like, big home, and how often are you there?

>> I haven’t even spent a night in it. So I got an apartment and that’s where I am now.

Carson: So you have a house and an apartment, and you probably spend all of your time where?

>> At home.

Carson: At home. That’s ridiculous.

>> Isn’t it?

>> Yes.

Carson: Why don’t the two of you guys just live together?

>> No way.

Carson: Just the two of you?

>> It would be like “battle royale.”

[ Laughter ]

Carson: You could have your own reality show. Call it “The Osbournes.” It would be genius.

>> Wouldn’t it?

Carson: Yeah. Did you ever live together? What is — what does jack
do now that bothers you the most?

[ In nerdy voice ]

>> Oh, yeah!

>> That. He does this voice that, even if I’m in the best mood ever,
I’ll want to, like, slit my wrists.

Carson: What was it again?

>> It’s like a — it’s like the perverted nerd guy, it’s like —

[ In nerdy voice ] “Oh, yeah, [ Bleep ] Up my glasses! Aww!”

[ Laughter ]

>> And I — seriously, like, he did it to me for eight hours yesterday,
and it brought me to tears.

>> And she threw a tantrum.

Carson: People just see you guys fight. Underneath that is — you remember when Kelly was doing — she was performing at the movie awards?

>> Mm-hmm.

Carson: And you had your video camera there. I mean, there really is
— you guys actually have a great relationship.

>> Yeah. Well, you know what it is? It’s like — you spend any amount
of time with someone for so long, you start biting at each other’s throats. MTV just takes the, you know, the worst parts of our day —

>> They get us to beat each other up.

Carson: Yeah, we all enjoy watching that.

>> No, it’s good for you, because you get to hit me, but I don’t get
to hit you.

Carson: Do you guys watch other reality shows? Have you seen “Newlyweds”?

>> I’m actually kinda really disappointed in “Newlyweds.”

Carson: Why?

>> ‘Cause all they’ve done is just taken our show and just, you know,
did it with them.

>> You know what it is? It’s like — it’s the same editors, it’s the
same crew. You know? But I kinda — like, I really feel sorry for her. Because I think they make her look like an idiot.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: You know — you know how you are in real life. And you know
how you’re portrayed.

>> But see, I know how I am — and that’s the thing. It’s like you’re
portrayed very differently to how you really are.

Carson: Right.

>> Like, I could sit there and whine all day long, you know? But, they’d make it look like I’ve whined for like five minutes. And all I’ve said is, “I feel sick. I have a stomachache. I have this, I have that. I have this –“

Carson: Right.

>> But when you’ve really said it once every, like — maybe you’ve made one complaint every two hours for two days. But they’ll make it look like
you’ve said it all in the space of five minutes, so you just look like an ass [ Bleep ].

>> But you know, with her, it’s like — it’s not just the one segment.
It’s the whole episode.

Carson: You guys seem frustrated by this whole process, jack. Why do you guys continue to do this?

>> ‘Cause it’s fun.

Carson: It is fun?

[ Laughter ]

>> And why not?

Carson: But you seem like you have this attitude, like, “ahh, ‘f’ the
cameras, and leave us alone. And we’re a family –” but —

>> But you know what?

Carson: Are you doing another season? Are they doing it again?

>> Yeah, we start — we start soon.

>> Sometime, like, in February they start filming. I don’t know. I stay
out of it.

Carson: Right. Jack, wanna ask you — now, being out of rehab, I understand you hang out at the playboy mansion quite a bit.

>> I went — I’ve been twice. We’re actually going to be —

Carson: Is it really such a great place for you to be hanging out?

>> It’s awesome. It’s awesome.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: It’s like the sex/drugs capital of California, for that matter.

>> But it’s amazing.

Carson: What do you like so much about it?

>> It’s just — it’s — I don’t know.

>> Halloween’s the best.

Carson: Halloween? Yeah.

>> I went to the Halloween one.

>> My favorite, yeah.

Carson: Jack, you should hook up with Vanessa’s co-star, James Caan, of course, who’s — you know. Whatever.

[ Laughter ] Did you see mini-me there by the grotto?

>> He was there when I was there.

>> Did you see the girl that he wanted to marry? The girl that was like a six foot —

Carson: Who? Mini-Me’s girlfriend?

>> Yeah. Like his fiancee —

Carson: She’s like the size of Shaq, and he’s —

>> Yeah. It’s like the weirdest thing ever. It was so funny.

>> How did he do it?

Carson: How do they do it?

>> He’s clearly the spinner in the relationship.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Good thing we hired those extra bleepers. I think it’s like
when you go to the gym, and they have, like those walls with the things

>> Uh-huh.

Carson: I think she’s just like a giant wall to him.

>> It’s like conquering Everest.

>> I mean, do midgets have, like, normal-sized willies?

>> It’s not a midget.

[ Laughter ]

>> Ooh, I meant “little people.”

Carson: Only on “last call” do they figure out if midgets have normal-sized willies.

[ Laughter ]

>> I don’t know.

Carson: Tune in, that’s good television. Season two — the DVD is out.
We usually buy DVDs for the, like, deleted scenes and stuff that is like too hot for the movie. What could they possibly have on “The Osbournes” DVD?

>> They have a game that something —

Carson: You mean, all the clean versions are on this?

>> No, there’s this stuff that’s not, like, on — like, you haven’t
seen before. Not sure what it is, because I haven’t even seen it.

Carson: Right.

>> And then they have, like, this game, “guess what my dad is saying.” ‘Cause they have a game, right?

Carson: Right. Yeah, yeah.

>> The first one doesn’t really count —

Carson: They make it hard to understand?

>> Yeah.

Carson: That’s crazy. I understand every word he says. And you have
a new tv show you’re working on?

>> Yeah.

Carson: What’s that all about?

>> More or less, it’s me pissing around in L.A.

[ Laughter ]

Carson: Be careful pissing around in L.A.

>> I know. Just interviewing people and stuff.

Carson: Well, good. You guys like Michelle Branch? Kelly, you like her,
don’t you?

>> I love Michelle.

Carson: Yeah?

>> I think she’s great.

Carson: Yeah? You wanna hang out and watch her perform?

>> Okay.

Carson: All right, fantastic. We’re gonna check out “The Osbournes”
season two DVD, it’s in stores now.

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4 thoughts on “Jack And Kelly Osbourne On Last Call

  1. StayGoneBeautiful says:

    Makes her “look” like an idiot? She IS an idiot!

  2. clayfan says:

    Kelly is AWESOME!! I adore her. Love Jack, too!

  3. spearBritney says:

    ^oh my lord! lmao! I am surprised Kelly didn’t bring up Christina in the interview since her fat ass is obsessed with her. well now she has Nick and Jess to complain about.

  4. grprincess says:

    Yeah Kelly hates Christina and she even spit on her car. But Christina deserves it for being such a nasty skank.

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