Jay Leno’s Wednesday Jacko-logue – Still No Verdict

Jay Leno joked during his Tonight Show monologue on Wednesday night, “As you know, there is still no verdict in the Michael Jackson trial. The trial couldn’t have come at a worse time for Michael ’cause school is out for the summer. This is his busy season. … And Lisa Marie Presley said in interviews this week that she and Michael Jackson did consummate the marriage, but the sex wasn’t that great. Apparently, that guy holding the umbrella over them was a a real turn off. … According to MTV News, if Michael Jackson does have to go to jail, he will be forced to cut his hair. He’ll have to cut his hair. Of course, they will still allow him to wear make-up. You can do that in prison. You can have short hair and make-up. You know, like Ryan Seacrest. … Let me tell you, see, this is a a very tough case because I think Michael is both guilty and not guilty. You know what I mean? It’s like everything else in his life, you know? He’s black, he’s white. He’s a guy, he’s a girl. He’s a human, he’s an alien. … Well, the latest word is that Michael Jackson is broke. Have you heard that? Yeah. In fact, he’s so broke, the nose he’s wearing now is the one that comes with the glasses.”