Comedian and ‘Celebrity Mole’ star Kathy Griffin was on the Jimmy Kimmel show on Thursday and discussed the much talked about Michael Jackson documentary that aired last night. Kathy said of the Martin Bashir show, “You know what I loved about that special? Every moment was insane.” Kimmel said, “One thing I like was the foreign guy who pretended to be his best friend for eight months and nailed him to the cross.” Read on for a transcript.
Jimmy: Wasn’t that good?
Kathy: You know what I loved about that special? Every moment was insane. It’s not like you watched a special. There was this one part that was really weird. Every minute was like in — he’s got to go to jail or jump off the balcony. He has to do something tomorrow.
Jimmy: One thing I like was the foreign guy who pretended to be his best friend for eight months and nailed him to the cross.
Kathy: The brits don’t screw around. They’ll put you on the cover.
Jimmy: It’s great. If you watch the thing, he and Michael are shopping. They’re riding the Ferris wheel. They’re holding hands. And the last thing, you’ve had plastic surgery. You’ve raped little boys. At: They weren’t say hey were shopping in Las Vegas.
Kathy: All they were doing was buying insane urns that he doesn’t pay for.
Jimmy: He got those for free?
Kathy: Yeah, but Sotheby’s is suing him, for paintings he bought. What’s shocking, too.
I’m on stage and I do a joke about him being a child molester people go boo. How dare you imply such a thing.
Jimmy: Those are probably people he molested.
Jimmy: Allegedly, of course.
Kathy: Of course. I’m making a joke.
Jimmy: His defense is he’s — see? Me and the boy. It’s really unbelievable
Kathy: I want you to reenact the face work with me. Ask me about my surgeries?
Jimmy: All right. Have you had plastic surgery?
Kathy: I had a lift. I had a nose job. I get my Botox every three months. How can you deny that? He’s saying — that’s ridiculous.
Jimmy: He’s shaking it off.
>> Kathy why don’t they ask him why he’s white.
Jimmy: Oprah asked him.
Kathy: They’re very blotchy looking.
Jimmy: He’s not blotchy. We have to thank for him because he really
is a national treasure. I find him much more entertaining now than when he had hits out, you know? His dad has produced — his parents have produced — think of that house. They have Tito and Janet —
Kathy: Latoya. Latoya is money in the bank.
Jimmy: She is.
Kathy: Always crazy.
Jimmy: And the underestimated Rebe. And this is — screw the Osbournes. That’s the father right there. Joe Jackson. Wow, look at that. He’s a Dracula figure.
Kathy: Does Michael come clean about the dad being a freak?
Jimmy: I didn’t see the whole thing. I just saw select highlights.
Kathy: It’s time for the parents to hold their own press conference and say “we stuck stuff up their butts. Sorry.” I don’t know what they put up there. God only knows but, kids aren’t just naturally that freaky.
Jimmy: They’re not at owl. I think that is the reality show of the year right there.
Kathy: So good.
Jimmy: It really is. That was a great, great show. If you missed that show, you have to get a tape from a friend. It is absolutely spectacular. It’s better than the super bowl. Let’s look again at Joe Jackson, Michael’s father, if you could. He looks like the joker or something, right?
Kathy: Yeah. Yeah. It’s so good.