Kissed Frogs, Married A Toad

said she had kissed a lot of frogs, but now I think she has gone and married a toad.

I like Britney as an artist and if I ever met her I am sure I would like her as a person so therefore I truly hope that she will be happy but I have my doubts. Her first marriage was a mistake; this one seems crass stupidity. The wedding was due to be a fairytale romantic affair in November but now the low-key haste would suggest to a cynic that perhaps she is pregnant. The first time I saw pictures of Britney with Kevin (in April) he with his ‘Bugs Bunny’ grin and silly jaw line beard, I thought she would end up married to him and that their relationship would last about 22 months from first date to signing the divorce papers. They therefore have about 16 months left. For her sake I hope I will be proved wrong. Let us hope her mother can hang in there for the sake of Britney and the resulting grandkids who will need someone to bring them up as Britney spirals into rehab.

Why has it come to this? Well here is my theory for what its worth, which you are at liberty to think is not much. I call it Child Star Syndrome: –
Between the onset of puberty and age 21 there are great changes in the body and the brain. The body finishes growing around about 18 but the brain continues its process of ‘wiring’ and settling its ability to function until someone is 21, which is why in the past your were not considered an adult until you had reached that age. If during this period of time you get famous, be it entertainer, sportsperson or whatever, then the core of the brain likes the adulation and locks onto whatever you were at that time and as a result that part is stuck at that age. In Britney’s case around about age 17. This causes a personality disorder as other parts of the brain have moved on. The more fame, the more problems. There is also guilt that they have got so much, relatively easily, at such a young age whereas their parents, relatives and friends will work and struggle for 40 or 50 years to get what they have got in a year or two. This leads the child star to want to punish themselves. Which in turn accounts for why many have so many problems in adult life. If you start with a child star like Mickey Rooney who was a mess until he was around his late 50s, through Michael Jackson to Britney Spears they all have personality problems, in fact I cannot think of many who have become ‘normal’ adults. A large percentage of people in the entertainment industry are also filled with insecurities and associated problems, they all seem to want to be loved and respected, so the position for ex child stars is compounded.

Then I have this Pop Singing Diva theory: –
All the Divas I can think of (from either side of the Atlantic) have come from relatively poor backgrounds and by sheer hard work, focus, determination and commitment have fought their way to the top. If they respect anyone it is others who are achievers also. However their choices of men seem to fall into two categories, ‘control freaks and/or abusers’ or ‘doormats they can dominate’. Either way the relationships do not last long, the diva walks out on the former, the man on the latter. I can only think of two divas that seem to have anything like a successful long-term relationship, Dolly Parton and to some extent Madonna. A ‘normal’ well adjusted female adult wants to mate with a man who is at least her equal if not superior by way of achievement or social standing. The cavewoman in her wants her offspring to have improved genes so they can stand a chance of doing better than her. Of course it is very difficult for a diva to find an eligible young male who has achieved anything approaching what they have and they are also unlikely to bump into the right person in a nightclub or at a show biz bash. Going back to Madonna, her Guy, had some achievement when they married but nowhere near her level but he was undoubtedly her superior socially in view of his background but whether that will be enough to hold them together only time will tell.

Now back to Britney Spears. She was the child star of the age with phenomenal adulation so part of her brain is trapped at age 17, combined with all the angst that goes with being an entertainer. She is a pop singing diva so has a limited choice of men. She chose a ‘doormat’ the first time and found another one in a nightclub. From what I have read in the tabloids he has walked out on her at least once already but she pleaded for him to return and he did – bad move. Like women victims of abusive husbands going back is not good, yes the abuser is full of remorse and promises to change at first but in their mind it reinforces their opinion that the victim is even weaker than they originally thought. Kevin had nothing, achieved nothing, had no prospects and at the very best is of similar social background to her. The fairy tale wedding has not happened so that is something she can use against him in the arguments ahead. I would not be surprised if she abandons her career about the time her greatest hits album comes out but that could be a big mistake, entertaining is engrained in her. Why have the Rolling Stones just come back off tour or Madonna currently on one, they don’t need the money, but they need the buzz of performing, will Britney be able to live without it? If not, in a year or so it is another stick for her to use. At the end, Kevin will get a settlement that will give him more money than he ever dreamed of and no doubt his memoirs, possibly entitled, ‘700 days bonking Britney’ should set him up for life.

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