Lance Bass Is Just ‘Regular Gay’

Jay Leno joked during his Tonight Show monologue on Friday night, “Lance Bass tells the current issue of People magazine that he is gay. But just regular gay, not George Michael-in-the-bushes gay. That’s another gay. … As you might have heard, George Michael and his long-term lover, their wedding is back on. Remember it was off? Well, now it’s back on. It had been called off after George was caught having sex in the park with some fat truck driver. Yeah, that’s what it said in the paper. But George figured he would apologize to his fiance by sending him one of these. This is the hottest thing you can get now. It’s the ‘Sorry I had sex with a guy in the park’ bouquet. … You know, it’s interesting. I was at newsstands today, and Lance Bass isn’t the only person to make a big announcement. Give me those magazines, Joy. This is the current issue of People. See right there it says, ‘Lance Bass: “I’m gay.”‘ This is the story. George michael is on Us magazine: ‘I’m really, really gay.’ Superman is on the cover of People: ‘I’m not gay!’ And surprisingly, on the current issue of Field & Stream, it’s Ryan Seacrest, ‘I’m going bass fishing.’ I don’t know what that means.”